The Big Wham-O

Richard Knerr, 82 forever, died today, having left the world such gifts as the Hula Hoop, the Frisbee--and Silly String. I thought I'd head out and buy a can of the stuff and write "Bye, Mr. Knerr" on the snow in the back yard, but much to my surprise, Silly String is now banned in Canada. Some nonsense about the ozone. Not banned in Iraq, though; the US army uses it to detect booby traps and trip wires. I both love and hate the idea of scared boys from Iowa sneaking through dangerous Babylon armed with Silly String, just as we were when stalking vampires through Glendale Meadows schoolyard in the 70s. Mostly though I wish the scared boys from Iowa could leave the stuff there for the Iraqi kids to play with and just come on back home and play with their own kids. Back in 1925, when Mister Richard Knerr was born, the Kingdom of Iraq was also a newborn. Who could have predicted, looking into those milky and disbelieving baby eyes, how it would all end--with the one responsible for covering the other with fluorescent plastic string?